01 January 2015

Corollaries


René Descartes:
I think, therefore I am.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
I think, therefore I think I am.

* * * *
Buddha's First Noble Truth:
Existence is painful.
Yaj Ekim's Noble Corollary:
So it goes. Deal with it. Get over it. Move on.  It will all be over soon enough.

* * * *
Socrates:
The unexamined life is not worth living.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
The examined life, only a little more, perhaps less so.

* * * *
Friedrich Nietzsche:
That which does not kill us makes us stronger.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
That which does not kill you today will take another stab at it tomorrow.

* * * *
Friedrich Nietzsche:
When you look into an abyss, the abyss also looks into you.
Yaj Ekim’s Corollary
When you look into an abyss, the abyss becomes you.

* * * *
Hippocratic Oath:
Primum non nocere … First do no harm.
Yaj Ekim’s Corollary:
Define harm.

* * * *
Yoda:
Try not.  Do, or do not.  There is no try.
Yaj Ekim’s Corollary:
To try requires effort.  To try is not doing.

* * * *
Albert Camus:
There is but one truly serious philosophical problem and that is suicide.
Yaj Ekim’s Corollary:
The second truly serious not-quite-philosophical problem is who buries who.

* * * *
Stephen King:
Any word you have to hunt for in a thesaurus is the wrong word.
There are no exceptions to this rule.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Alas, we cannot all be Stephen King.

* * * *
Sarlo:
Effing the Ineffable.
Yaj Ekim’s Corollary:
Effing away.

* * * *
Thomas Hobbes:
… and the life of man, solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short.
Yaj Ekim’s Corollary:
So it goes, deal with it, get over it, move on.

* * * *
Jane Smith (Angela Jolie in “Mr. & Mrs. Smth”):
Happy endings are just stories that haven't finished yet.
Yaj Ekim’s Corollary:
Uh-oh.

* * * *
Harvey Logan (Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid):
Rules!? In a knife fight!?
Yaj Ekim:
Rules!? In this world!?

* * * *
Anon:
Money cannot buy happiness.
Yaj Ekim:
Then how am I supposed to get my bottle of Jack?

* * * *
Curly (City Slickers):
The day ain’t over yet.
Yaj Ekim:
Waah!

* * * *
Kilgore Trout (a.k.a. Kurt Vonnegut) in “Timequake”
Men are jerks.  Women are psychotic.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly,
A Fistful of Chromosomes, A Few Chromosomes More.

* * * *
Arthur C. Clarke (2001: A Space Odyssey):
Then he [The Star Child] waited,
Marshaling his thoughts and brooding over his still untested powers.
For though he was master of the world, he was not quite sure what to do next.
But he would think of something.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Still thinking.

* * * *
Chuang-Tzu (The Butterfly as Companion):
Once upon a time, I dreamt I was a butterfly, fluttering hither and thither, to all intents and purposes a butterfly.  I was conscious only of my happiness as a butterfly, unaware that I was myself.  Soon I awaked, and there I was, veritably myself again.  Now I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly, dreaming I am a man.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Or neither dreaming both.

* * * *
Yoda:
Try not.  Do, or do not.  There is no try.
Yaj Ekim’s Corollary:
Do what?

* * * *
William Makepeace Thackeray:
There are a thousand thoughts lying within a man
that he doe not know till he takes up the pen to write.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Only a thousand?

* * * *
Melvin Udall (Jack Nicholson) (As Good as It Gets):
[to a group of depressed psychiatric patients]
What if this is as good as it gets?
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
How could it be any better?

* * * *
George Orwell:
People sleep peaceably in their beds at night
Only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
People sleep peacefully in their beds at night
Only because geeky nerds sit ready to write algorithms
For their shopping pleasure for things they never once really needed.

* * * *
J.R.R. Tolkien (Lord of the Rings):
Frodo Baggins: I wish it need not happen in my time.
Gandalf: So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide.
All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Decide well, Friend, decide well.

* * * *
Mom:
Not everyone can be like you.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
But, but, but …

* * * *
Ecclesiastes:
Nothing new under the sun.
A time to be born and a time to die.
Vanity of vanities; all is vanity.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Live and learn, die anyway.

* * * *
Melvin Udall to a group of depressed psychiatric patients
(Jack Nicholson in As Good as It Gets):
What if this is as good as it gets?
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Waaa!!!

* * * *
Mickey Knox's father’s last words
Before he blows his head off with a shotgun
(Natural Born Killers):
Do you believe in fate, boy?
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Nothing but.

* * * *
Nikos Kazantzakis:
There is only one woman in the world. One woman, with many faces.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
There is only one monkey in the world. One monkey, with many faces.

* * * *
William Shakespeare (MacBeth):
Lady MacBeth: What's done cannot be undone.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Waaa!!!

* * * *
Jean Baudrillard:
The great person is ahead of their time.
The smart make something out of it, and the blockhead, sets themselves against it.
Yaj Ekim’s Corollary:
The middle path is living in relative anonymity, and leaving it for the world to find, or not.
In the vanity-vanity of it, does it really matter?

* * * *
Kurt Vonnegut (Cat’s Cradle):
Bokonon: If I am ever put to death on the hook, expect a very human performance.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Much more entertaining than a worm.

* * * *
Lee Hoffmann:
The good die young, Michael.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Well, at least I know I won’t live as long as you.

* * * *
Zhuangzi (Chuang Tzu):
Once upon a time, I, Chuang Chou, dreamt I was a butterfly,
Fluttering hither and thither, to all intents and purposes a butterfly.
Now I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly,
Or whether I am now a butterfly, dreaming I am a man.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Or perhaps neither dreaming both.

* * * *
Irish Proverb:
Curiosity killed the cat.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Don’t be a cat.

* * * *
Plato:
Only the dead have seen the end of war.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
Only the dead have seen the end of absurdity.

* * * *
Nikos Kazantzakis:
There is only one woman in the world. One woman, with many faces.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
… Yes Dear … You were right … I was wrong … I’m sorry …
The litany every man best remember if he doesn’t care to camp out on a couch or in a car.

* * * *
The Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear:
I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
And what fear could there be if there were no desire for one more or another?

* * * *
Walt Whitman:
I think I could turn and live with animals.  They are so placid and self-contained.  I stand and look at them long and long.  They do not sweat and whine about their condition.  They do no lie awake in the dark and weep for their sins.  They do not make me sick discussing their duty to God.  Not one is dissatisfied.  Not one is demented with the mania of owning things.  Not one kneels to another, nor to his kind that lived thousands of years ago.  Not one is respectable or industrious over the whole earth.
Yaj Ekim's Corollary:
So lucky, and they don’t even know it.